Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Dear Joe Budden


*sigh* I didn't ever want to write this letter. After 'Ordinary Love Sh*t: Part 2' I thought your knack for wifing up buxom beauties with more stars in their hearts than love was gone. Lo and behold, I woke up this morning to a profanity-laced back-and-forth between you and your estranged video model girlfriend Esther Baxter. Something about her cheating on you with while she was pregnant... Not more than a few minutes after that, 'Ordinary Love Sh*t: Part 3' started surfacing around the Interwebs, and I knew something was up.

Joe Budden - Ordinary Love Sh*t - Part 3

Cut to the Frank Ocean 'Novacane' instrumental,
SIDENOTE: Rappers, don't start jumping on the OFWGKTA bandwagon, using their instrumentals, just because the rest of the world is feeling them.
and the listener hears you at your finest: mad. You wax prophetic about past tiffs with Tahiry and how you said you would never doubt your gut feeling again when it came to women. From calling out Derrick Ward for the affair, 2nd and 3rd pregnancies, kids being involved, it was like an episode of Maury that had taken the drug known as Charlie Sheen. The song itself was piff (see last paragraph), yet there is something wrong with letting your laundry fly all over the place, especially when it's the same brand of drawers. #seewhatididthere

My beef, or rather my issue, is this Joey: why do you keep wifing hoes, and expecting less than hoe behavior? As the saying goes, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing and expecting different results. In Tahiry's case, I suppose you got a pass, because no one knew who that broad was before she became your arm candy. In Esther's case, we've known about her for years! I was a sophomore in high school when I first remember drooling to Esther's bodacious curves in Petey Pablo's 'Freek-a-Leek' video. It's like Denny Green's famous tirade: (Esther is) who we thought (she was)!! You of all should know that, man. You've been a rapper long enough to know when a woman has little if any intention of being good to you.

That said, Joey, while this type of drama is very unsightly for your public image and overall fandom, as a hip-hop fan, I love it! This is what music is supposed to be about! Raw emotion! Unreserved honesty! No qualms! Forget about who's listening! Just say it! Don't let people ever doubt where your head and heart are at. That's when you turn into B.o.B. and start shooting out undirected diss tracks. One of your strengths as an artist is that you tell it how it is; the hairy, ugly, morbidly obese, clap-infested truth! That you had to endure another public break-up is sad, yes. No one really wants to put their ex on blast... Well, maybe you take solace in that. I suppose we can lament another one of your failed relationships while we laugh at the pure hilarity that is your interview on the Breakfast Club, who seemed just as in awe of your revelations as the rest of the world was...